now is 4.11pm 30 june 2008,

i might b single on 1st july 2008..

lolx..thing happen..dun ask mi wat..especially mr jimmy..pls dun ask..

so wait for him to choose ba..i m tired of coaxing..

lolololo...

mrG say i no update~

y miss mi ar? *shy*

*VOMIT~~~~~~~~~~*

=pPppPPPpppPP

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mood had not been quite gd tis few days..very unstable mood..haha alway breakdwn..dun ask mi y i myself duno..even now i m still feeling tis way..

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nowadays i keep wondering abt my luv life..e problem i had e problem i face..i cant come out with a conclusion but i m really tired of thinking..wat shld we do..wat shld i do..i duno i really duno..can some1 tel mi wat to do..

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can some1 love mi?

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me to mrG:

kor....will u buy mi some strawberry + chocolate?

LOLX

=P

eLLo..

gers..agent had sent out all our items~~~

for the oos item i will have to come out with a calculation cox agent using paypal exchange rate and also refund me via paypal i had to pay a little fee to withdrawn e amt of money..paypal is blood sucking..

*counting star*

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seriously i really dont know what to do..i got the urge to break but realli think of 6yrs ago hurt i realli lost all my courage..

recently he will treat mi sudden sweet sudden coldly..

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i know i m a lousy gf..but i deserve respect too..

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some1 pls luv mi..

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*amen*

current mood: down

simply just feel like crying..

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missL ask mi, if i dont intend to stay wif SIO y am i still clinching on to tis r/s..i duno hw to ans..

mayb bcox i dun1 watever happen 6yrs ago..to happen again..e hurt is unbearable..but m i doin e rite choice i duno..i seriously duno if clinching on to tis r/s for wat..is bcox i love him or bcox i m used to have him ard?

but there is times when we nv meet..i feel erm..nth just miss him but nth much nt as if miss till dying to c him..n recently..no i shld say since last yr..whenever i meet him i machiam use drag de..cox i m nt tt enthu/keen/excited to meet him..

whenever he told mi nxt week dun meet...I AM SO DAMN HAPPY FOR THE REST OF MY DAYS/WEEK..

but happy days dun last..as he will last min pop up meet..haix..i feel so much like telling him N O = NO..

but i m lack of courage (mrG mux b wondering OMG TIS KAILIN SAYING SHE LACK OF COURAGE, I TOT SHE IS 1 STUPID FIERCE WOMAN WHO IS ALWY WHACKING ME!!!!!!)

nt sure if lack of courage or lack of the mood to quarrel with him..

no meet = he anyhow think = quarrel..

or it is bcox staying @ hm will onli create conflict btw mi n my mom/dad/siblings tt is y i dun mind meeting him?

i rmb i told missD mayb i dun1 to feel regret tt is y i clinch on..but if he ask for a break out i will happily accept..

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or mayb wat i need is a key to unlock my feeling..

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i rmb watching 2nd last or last epi of Rhythm Of Life (变奏曲), there is tis scene tt lee ming shun went to the wishing pool to make a wish to turn back time so tt he can create a happy ending..at tt very very very moment..i sms him(SIO):

if i realli can turn back time, i dont wish to know u.

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dun ask mi y..it is my 1st tot..

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his replied was swt..but i wasnt touch @ all..

he did reply hours later(when i had fallen aslp) he said if realli can turn back time he still wan to knw mi..

my replied to him e nxt mrng was:

pls dun come n knw mi if u can turn back time..

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does tt mean tt he actually dun stand a place in my heart..or is it bcox i had been hurt too much till i have no more feeling anymore? is it bcox i dun love him? i myself nt sure..

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do i still love him?

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